Pretty much nothing. I’m kind of in a rut. I’ve been pondering pioneer life while doing all sorts of non-pioneer things. Like using electricity. And silently hurling obscenities at my once wonderful bread machine. Atrocious, un-ladylike, made-up words because it won’t knead properly. I’ve also been thumbing my nose at state regulations while practicing cosmetology without a license - TWICE in one week! Once doing my baby sister’s (the hair dresser) roots (let me just say it was quite gratifying to see how much more gray she has). Later plucking my mama’s chin. That left me a little horrified and praying I didn’t get the chin hair gene. I’m an excellent chin-plucker when given the proper tools. However those that know me personally are scoffing aloud as I am in no way qualified to do hair. I don’t even get my own hair “done”. And I’ve had my hair tinted only once in my life. It did not turn out well. Not well at all.
I’ll spare the full story as The Husband would just veto its publication. I’ll just give you the basic ingredients and let you fill in the blanks.
1. A really cute college-aged me.
2. A bottle of hair color.
3. The Husband (pre-husband status but fully licensed to apply said hair color).
4. Lots of smooching.
5. A little less attention to the critical passage of time.
I sent him purple daisies the following day. The card read:
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Do this to my hair again
And your eye will be too.
Sadly I had bangs at the time and they were most affected. Which was a mixed blessing – it didn’t take too terribly long to grow out but the shocking purple hue was front and center for all to see.
Now I do nothing to my hair, and I mean NOT A THING. Despite having four immediate relatives that are licensed to cut hair all the live long day, I only go in about once a quarter. And only if the moon is growing. I’m just one of those long-haired weirdo hippie freaks. I don’t know why. It’s just me. I know it bugs three of them. But the fourth one loves me just the way I am. So it’s all good.
"Baby Sister" Bekah said,
March 16, 2010 @ 10:19 pm
You know, that’s quite witty of you…. As they say, “You’re the witty one.” I am not amused.
Although, you did a great job on my hair color! Hahaha!!! Love you to pieces! PS. REMINDER, you’ll always be 7 years older…
The Pie Mistress said,
March 16, 2010 @ 10:23 pm
That’s cool so long as people continue to think I’m the younger sister. : )
"Baby Sister" Bekah said,
March 16, 2010 @ 10:25 pm
I share in your fear of the chin hair gene too!!! Already got the premature grey. Lord, I hope I don’t get that one too!
tickledred said,
March 17, 2010 @ 7:25 am
I am just praying the mustache that seems to be growing now, stays platinum blond so that I can ignore it a few more years
nancy martin said,
March 18, 2010 @ 8:51 am
i’ve got you beat. i found out years ago that i was alergic to hair color so being the vain person that i am i found something called henna that i could use. thinking that i knew everything of course i could not be bothered reading the directions. my hair turned out magenta and could not be washed out. i wore a turban, but it would slip revealing the horrible mess. had to take my daughter to college during this time. while moving her into dorm a young man looked at me, knowing that i was to old to be a rock star, and said is that hair for real? of course my 18 year old daughter figured i had ruined her life and snubbed me. life goes on, my hair grew out, i think that my daughter still holds it against me. aunt nancy
The Pie Mistress said,
March 18, 2010 @ 8:58 am
Please tell me you have pictures!
"Baby Sister"-Bekah said,
March 19, 2010 @ 7:19 pm
Oh my gosh!! Aunt Nancy, that is hilarious!!!!! That does have us all beat
“for real” hahaha. Love you both!
nancy martin said,
March 20, 2010 @ 9:56 am
my dear jessica — i thought you knew me better than that.